"24" hour news

Sure, it's silly to expect much from local TV news, but its slow descent into whoring sea donkeydom can really be awe-inspiring. Take last night's story on New York's Fox affiliate WNYW, which tackled the thorny issue: What makes "24" so damn good? The answer: Violence! But good violence, the donkeys assured us; rich, nourishing violence that will make us all sleep a little better at night. People just love it! This news story followed Fox's broadcast of "24," and was teased several times during the show, so we had to see if it could possibly be as shameless as it seemed. It didn't disappoint. The "reader letters" at the end are a particularly nice touch. Where'd they get those -- Iwant2dojackbauer.com? (Don't get us wrong -- we never miss "24." But many critics, on the left and right, object to the killing and torture on the show. But don't expect to hear about that from the news readers at WNYW Fox 5!)