The Fix

Travolta says Scientology could have helped Anna Nicole. Paris facing jail time? Plus: Mills says flying leg "very unlikely."

Published March 1, 2007 2:30PM (EST)

First Word

Bahamas burial to proceed: It has been three weeks since Anna Nicole Smith died, and Wednesday a Florida court finally cleared the way for her burial by turning down her mother's appeal to take custody of Smith's remains. The funeral is now set to take place on Friday at 10:30 a.m. in the Bahamas. The court ruled that Smith's "last ascertainable wish" was to be buried alongside her son, Daniel, in a Nassau cemetery. Meanwhile, the National Enquirer is reporting that "preliminary findings" from Smith's autopsy show that she died from an advanced case of pneumonia, not a drug overdose. (E!, National Enquirer)

McCain announces announcement to Letterman: The '08 presidential campaign will officially be getting one more contender come April -- last night on "Late Show With David Letterman," Sen. John McCain joined the trend of announcing that he'll be announcing by telling Letterman he'll officially begin his White House bid in April. "The last time we were on this program ... you asked me if I would come back on this show if I was going to announce," said McCain. "I am announcing that I will be a candidate for president of the United States." Until it shows up elsewhere online, you can watch the clip here. (Bloomberg)

Dueling sequels? "Narc" director Joe Carnahan said last month that he's planning to make a movie out of the sequel to novelist James Ellroy's "L.A. Confidential," a book called "White Jazz," with George Clooney in the lead role. Now, reports TMZ, Curtis Hanson and Brian Helgeland -- the pair behind the film version of "L.A. Confidential," starring Guy Pearce and Russell Crowe -- are planning to make their own sequel, picking up where the first film left off. Carnahan says he plans to start shooting in the fall; no word on how firm Hanson and Helgeland's plans are -- or whether the original actors will reprise their roles. (TMZ)

White noise ... John Travolta says he regrets that Anna Nicole Smith died before Scientology's drug program Narconon had the chance to get to her: "It's so sad. We could have helped her with Narconon but didn't get a chance to. I wish we had." (The Scoop) ... Orlando Bloom and Penélope Cruz reportedly spent much of Prince's Oscar night party making out with each other. "It was crazy!" says a source. "Touching, kissing -- even a little bit of groping. And in view of tons of actors, too, like Leonardo DiCaprio and Ryan Gosling." (Gatecrasher) ... Paris Hilton is facing revocation of her probation (and thus possible jail time) after being arrested for speeding with her lights off while driving with what authorities say is a suspended license -- she was arrested last fall for DUI. (Associated Press) ... A Los Angeles judge yesterday granted Jeff Goldblum a restraining order against a woman who the actor claims has been stalking him for years -- he says she visited his house over 50 times in the past few months, sometimes blocking his driveway with her car. (BBC News) ... Visiting a wildlife park in the U.K. with girlfriend Kate Moss, Pete Doherty tossed what looked like a joint into a penguin pen, where one of the birds ate it. "Everyone knew he was smoking grass," a witness told the Sun. "He was joking about getting the penguins stoned." (The Sun)

Talker

Mac world: As we noted a few weeks back, Apple's "Mac vs. PC" ads have arrived in a new form and with new actors in the U.K., though not to universal acclaim. (Guardian columnist Charlie Brooker wrote that the ads make one think of Macs as "just smug, preening tossers.") While most other countries just get dubbed versions of the U.S. versions of the ads, they've been reshot for Japan as well, using actors from the Japanese comedy group the Rahmens (see a recent ad on Video Dog). Writing that in Japan, "direct-comparison ads have long been frowned upon," the Wall Street Journal reports that the Japanese ads tend to emphasize "that Macs and PCs are not that different." But the nerd/hipster divide that the U.S. ads rely on may not go over as well there -- as one ad executive who works in the Japanese market tells the paper, nerds are "really quite revered now in Japanese culture." ("Mac and PC's Overseas Adventures," Wall Street Journal)

Buzz Index

; )

"Norah Jones Releases Debut Album for Third Time" (The Onion)

"It's very unlikely my leg is going to fly off, although it would be quite funny. I'll have a strap on which I wouldn't normally in every day life."

-- Heather Mills on her upcoming turn on "Dancing With the Stars." (AOL)

Numbers

Though sales of the album fell 53 percent, Norah Jones' "Not Too Late" is No. 1 again on this week's Billboard chart -- it's also Amazon.com's No. 1 seller in music. (Billboard, Amazon.com)

Turn On

Thursday night, it's the season finale of "Nashville Star" (USA, 10 p.m. EST) and the premiere of the British sketch comedy show about sex, "Swinging" (ABC, 9 p.m. EST), and the "Ace of Cakes" (Food Network, 10:30 p.m. EST) takes his skills to the Baltimore Fire Department.

Talk

SHOW GUESTS
Regis and Kelly (ABC, 9 a.m. EST) James Denton, Jewel, a visit to the "Dancing With the Stars" set
The View (ABC, 11 a.m. EST) Dennis Miller, Suze Orman
Ellen (Syndicated, check local listings) Nicollette Sheridan, Terri and Bindi Irwin (repeat)
Oprah (Syndicated, check local listings) NFL player Isaiah Kacyvenski, chef Jeff Henderson, Laurie Johnson
Charlie Rose (PBS, check local listings) Harold Pinter
Larry King (CNN, 9 p.m. EST) Bob Woodruff
Jon Stewart (Comedy Central, 11 p.m. EST) Sam Sheridan
Stephen Colbert (Comedy Central, 11:30 p.m. EST) Larry King
David Letterman (CBS, 11:30 p.m. EST) Dennis Miller, Bob Woodruff, John Mayer
Jay Leno (NBC, 11:35 p.m. EST) Howie Mandel, Chris Hansen, Korn
Jimmy Kimmel (ABC, 12:05 a.m. EST) Ray Liotta, Nadine Velasquez, Danity Kane
Conan O'Brien (NBC, 12:35 a.m. EST) Anderson Cooper, Rob Corrdry, Son Volt
Craig Ferguson (CBS, 12:35 a.m. EST) Jennifer Tilly, Seth MacFarlane, the Cat Empire

 

Bookmark the Fix here | See a directory of recent columns | Send tips to thefix@salon.com

Fix contributors: Heather Havrilesky, Scott Lamb, Kerry Lauerman, David Marchese, Laura Miller, Andrew O'Hehir, Amy Reiter, Stephanie Zacharek

Fix logo by Rhonda Rubinstein


By Scott Lamb

Scott Lamb is a senior editor at BuzzFeed.com.

MORE FROM Scott Lamb


Related Topics ------------------------------------------