X-rated executions in Iran

Memo to Jenna Jameson, Ron Jeremy, Paris Hilton and all manner of X-rated stars: It might be wise to cancel any upcoming Iranian vacations.

Today, the country's Parliament passed a bill calling for the death penalty for anyone involved in a pornographic film. According to the bill, "producers of pornographic works and main elements in their production are considered corrupter of the world and could be sentenced to punishment as corrupter of the world." If the bill makes it through Iran's Guardian Council, everyone from a film's star on down to the fluffer could be sentenced to death or, if they're lucky, a year in prison.

Porn magazines and books are already banned in the country, but it seems a recent sex tape scandal renewed the Parliament's interest in curbing pornography. Last year, a video was leaked to the public of actress Zahra Amir Ebrahimi allegedly "having intercourse with a man," reports the Associated Press. Ebrahimi denies that she's the woman in the film, but still "faces fines, whip lashing or worse for her violation of Iran's morality laws."

Inevitably, late-night talk show hosts will soon be mining this from-another-world news brief for laughs. Nerve's Scanner already beat us to this golden nugget: "Debbie will not be doing Tehran." I say we get all the laughing out of the way now, you know, before the executions actually begin.