It may be damning with faint praise to call “Fifty Shades Freed” the best “Fifty Shades” yet, but this “climax” (in Imax!) to the trilogy of films based on E.L. James’ phenomenally popular bestsellers, is — unlike the previous entries — actually really mostly pretty good.
The previous films, “Fifty Shades of Grey” and “Fifty Shades Darker,” were risible erotic dramas that were barely erotic and over-dramatic. This film, like its blindingly attractive leads, has zero body fat. It’s focused on plot, and lots of it. This entry in the series zooms along like the film’s Audi R8. There is a whole season full of soap operatics in store for viewers here and that is partly what makes it so enjoyable.
“Fifty Shades Freed” opens with the Anastasia Steele (Dakota Johnson) marrying billionaire Christian Grey (Jamie Dornan). She wears something white and lacy to the wedding, and one half expects him to be in black leather (a harness, perhaps?). But he saves that gear for the red playroom.
Cue montage of the newlyweds taking their private jet off to Paris — the most romantic city in the world! — making love in a canopy bed (how traditional!), biking by the Louvre, and running through the rain to a café. It’s so cliché its downright charming.
Don’t worry fans, there still is some “kinky fuckery.” When Ana defies Christian by going topless at a beach against his wishes, he “punishes” her with some handcuffs and legcuffs.
“I should misbehave more often,” she purrs after.
Herein lies the pleasure of “Fifty Shades Freed.” The film seems to have an intentional sense of humor. It takes the romance fiction fantasy of an innocent young woman being wooed by a rich, hunky, but troubled guy to heart and never plays it seriously.
Alas, the honeymooners’ fun ends when there is news of a break-in at Grey Enterprises. Forced to return to Seattle, Ana and Christian must deal with the threat posed by her lecherous old boss, Jack Hyde (Eric Johnson). He is out for revenge. Christian is so protective of his new wife, he keeps a gun in a drawer in his desk. Ana finds the weapon, so expect that to go off before the end credits.
Christian also arranges for 24-hour security for Ana. This prompts a laugh-out-loud funny line when Ana’s assistant Hannah (Ashleigh LaThrop) makes a comment regarding Ana’s SAF bodyguard Sawyer (Brant Daugherty).
But back to the point. Apparently, marriage in “Fifty Shades Freed” is more than a bond for Ana and Christian, it is a form of bondage. He continues to keep her on a tight leash, following her every move. It’s almost creepy, and she almost minds, but this, the film explains, is how Christian expresses his love for her. Protection, however, doesn’t extend to the use of condoms, and the spouses soon have to discuss the possibility of kids. He wants them someday, which disappoints her.
“Babies mean no sex,” Christian insists fearing marital bed death. Dornan is so damn irresistible, he can pull lines like that off.
And Christian definitely wants to pull off Ana’s clothes and have sex. Just watch as he teasingly unhooks the top of a fabulously slinky silver dress Ana barely wears (She describes it in a way that produces another genuine laugh).
There are a few scenes in the playroom — one of which actually has Ana using her safe word because Christian is deliberately frustrating her with a sex toy. It becomes a teaching moment that helps the couple communicate better.
And communication is a key in this film. Both Ana and Christian deny the other pleasure as a way of making a point about how they should treat one another. That the characters behave like a couple in an actual, everyday relationship is endearing, however extreme their luxury and lifestyle is.
Moreover, Ana may have been as sexually adventurous as she was naïve, but she has always been very clear about expressing her limits. Her speeches to Christian are justified, and she can be seen as quite the feminist given how much agency she has in the film. Yes, she wants to baby Christian, just as he wants to care for and protect her. But isn’t that what loving one’s partner is all about? “Fifty Shades Freed” is actually touching, and romantic.
But for those viewers who just want to see Ana and Christian shut up and fuck. Well, to its credit, “Fifty Shades Freed” contains arguably the only truly erotic scene in the entire trilogy. It involves Ana smearing and then licking ice cream off Christian’s gorgeous bare torso (Probably vanilla, given that the couple purchased a pint in “Fifty Shades Darker”). When a naked Christian returns the flavor — er, favor — along the inside of her thighs, well, viewers may be melting along with that ice cream. It is an incredibly sexy sequence and redeems the series for all the forgettable softcore S&M porn in the past.
Despite all these worthwhile elements, the film does go over the top in the last few reels, as a series of plot contrivances pile up quickly. They involve a bail hearing, Ana discovering she’s pregnant, a kidnapping, that aforementioned gun going off, and the requisite hospital scene. It’s all too much too fast, but hey, that’s what happens when you race towards a climax.
That the film also features a memory montage of Ana and Christian’s relationship is curious because none of the clips feature the couple’s activities in the playroom, which is kind of the series’ raison d’être.
As Anastasia Steele, Dakota Johnson gives an assured performance — “topping from the bottom” as it were. She alternates between playing tough and being vulnerable and is convincing at both. Johnson also has some palpable chemistry with her co-star, Jamie Dornan here. His performance may be as stiff as his body, but as long as he wears those ripped jeans that hang just so around his hips, displaying that stunning muscled chest and his sacrum, no viewer in the film’s target audience is going to mind.
And if Christian catches anyone rolling their eyes at “Fifty Shades Freed,” well, he will put them in his playroom. For viewers who submit to the distinctive pleasures of these films, that is not such a bad place to be.
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