COMMENTARY

"I wasn't being authentically me": Wayne Brady paints a portrait of pansexuality through reality TV

Brady comes out on his docuseries "The Family Remix," not long after "Bridgerton" awakened Benedict's pansexuality

By Melanie McFarland

Senior Critic

Published July 25, 2024 1:30PM (EDT)

Wayne Brady: The Family Remix (Freeform)
Wayne Brady: The Family Remix (Freeform)

Gentle, velvety soft tension is the defining vibe of “Wayne Brady: The Family Remix.” Some would call that on-brand for an entertainer whose claim to fame is his niceness. Since the late '90s Brady has been the guy you picture when you think “avuncular TV guest star or host.” Before he became the new face of “Let’s Make a Deal” in 2009, he hosted Fox’s “Don’t Forget the Lyrics” and was the musically blessed member of the “Whose Line Is It Anyway?” ensemble. Playing against that portrait on “Chappelle’s Show” only made him more likable.

"Family Remix” is consistent with that depiction, showing Brady in his element as an engaged and understanding father who is committed to his family. With a few modifications.

Brady and his ex-wife Mandie Taketa, who remains his best friend despite their marriage ending in 2008, lovingly co-parent their 21-year-old daughter Maile as she prepares to strike out on her own. Brady takes pride in that, along with the unconventional development of welcoming Taketa’s life partner Jason Michael Fordham into their family.

The “core four,” as they call themselves, collaborate on TikTok videos, hash out problems over dinner and consult each other in making major decisions. They are, in effect, the quintessentially functional household. And their aggressive normalcy accompanies the life-changing subplot of Brady’s coming out as pansexual in 2023.

“Family Remix” captures that process in the docuseries, starting from his first inklings of wanting to chronicle each step through his first-person account in People magazine. That revelation is old news by now. What we haven’t seen is the emotional and psychological work that went into the 52-year-old performer’s decision.

“You can show the world whoever you want on Instagram or TikTok,” Brady said at a recent Television Critics Association press conference held in Pasadena. “I think the difference for us is the reality show . . . was my weird way of holding myself accountable and making me do it.”

That is no small thing. “Family Remix” begins with the star mulling the real possibility that coming out would end his career and cost him fans. “Maybe after hearing what I have to say, you won’t want me to be in your family or be in your homes anymore,” he says in the show. “And that is a fear.”

Wayne Brady: The Family RemixWayne Brady: The Family Remix (Freeform)

Is it unfounded? Queer actors and characters are now commonplace on TV.  “Family Remix” streams on Hulu, home to three seasons of its original queer YA dramedy “Love, Victor.” 

Many ensembles feature queer characters – “Heartstopper,” “The Umbrella Academy,” “Sort Of” and “One Day at a Time,” to name a few, along with ABC’s “Modern Family,” which ran for 11 seasons. One of CBS’ biggest hits, “Tracker,” showcases Robin Weigert and Abby McEnany as Teddi and Velma Bruin, the title character’s married handlers.

RuPaul Charles still reigns over reality TV, thanks to the ubiquitously popular “RuPaul’s Drag Race,” although his Emmy title may be challenged by Alan Cumming’s genius turn on the American edition of “The Traitors.”

Television isn't lacking for series that acknowledge queer people exist and enjoy stable, entirely boring long-term relationships. Fewer popular TV shows are willing to explore what it means to embrace that journey from first flickering to fully living as one is meant to.

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Recently “Bridgerton” drew mixed reactions by announcing that its fourth season would focus on Benedict (Luke Thompson), the second Bridgerton son who, in Season 3, enjoyed a tryst with a woman and man. Later, he notes that gender does not matter to him, making Benedict pansexual.

“Bridgerton” honors the tone established by the sensual novels that inspire it, and some hope the series might cash in the currency it has built with its fanbase to write a thoughtful romance that honors the sexual awakening of Thompson’s character. According to the official announcement, the person setting Benedict's heart aflutter is “a captivating Lady in Silver at his mother's masquerade ball."

“I wasn't being authentically me."

But these are all fictional figures or performers playing caricatures of themselves. Brady is a widely beloved celebrity walking us through every step of a process that he finds frightening but necessary. When he comes out to two close male friends, we get to watch them process that information. One's immediate reaction is entirely reasonable: he blurts out in so many words that he doesn’t know what “pansexual” means. 

Other members of his extended family weren’t aware of his sexual orientation during filming, and Brady's concerns about having them drop from his life are perceptible.

Wayne Brady: The Family RemixWayne Brady: The Family Remix (Freeform)

This is not necessarily foregrounded in every episode. The boring, workaday tasks of running his career and mindfully negotiating parenthood with Taketa are among the episodic A-plots leading the season. But the matter of Brady’s pansexuality is always floating just outside the frame of each scene. The toll of holding it in also affects his mental health which, in turn, affects his interactions with Taketa, their daughter and Fordham, who Brady calls his brother.

“I wasn't being authentically me,” Brady explained to critics before "Family Remix" premiered. "I can walk onstage and be charming and affable and make you laugh . . . I could make millions of people happy, but I would go home, and I'd feel like a piece of [expletive], and I couldn’t do that anymore.”


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Celebrity docuseries tend to be self-serving plays to increase fandom and burnish brands. “Family Remix” doesn’t entirely break free of this. Brady has a career to maintain, having recently wrapped his time with “The Wiz,” and these episodes show Maile polishing a new pop single (“Gotta Have It,” which dropped in January).

And he says factors are part of what inspired him to do “Family Remix.” For most of his professional life, Brady told reporters, he subscribed to the old showbiz approach of wowing the public and refraining from talking about himself. As the world has changed, what he needs to be happy has evolved as well.

In the show, Brady reiterates that all he desires is what his ex-wife and her partner have, which is to find his person. Be they a man, a woman, a non-binary person, whomever – he wants the freedom to walk around with that person and love them freely.

Therefore, he said, “I'm just going to show you warts and all, not because I crave internet fame but because if you like me, you like me. If you don't, you don't. I'm still the same guy, doing the same thing. And hopefully after decades of doing it, I've still got a couple more decades in me. But now, you'll see the person behind the work.

“And I think that sometimes that's a good thing,” he added, “especially if you're trying to inspire others just in the sense of, hey, even if I make you laugh, we all have bad days, and this is how you go through them, as long as you've got people that'll have your back.”

"Wayne Brady: The Family Remix” airs at 10 p.m. Wednesdays on Freeform on Wednesday, July 24, streaming Thursdays on Hulu.


By Melanie McFarland

Melanie McFarland is Salon's award-winning senior culture critic. Follow her on Twitter: @McTelevision

MORE FROM Melanie McFarland


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Bisexuality Bridgerton Commentary Lgbtq Pansexuality Tca The Family Remix Tv Wayne Brady