Donald Trump is over-the-top on an hourly basis, but even by his standards, his frenetic defense of Tesla CEO Elon Musk this week was unsettling. "Elon Musk is 'putting it on the line' in order to help our Nation, and he is doing a FANTASTIC JOB!" Trump posted on Truth Social at 12:14 AM on Tuesday. Musk's company is seeing plummeting stock prices and sales, around the world, due to his association with Trump and his efforts to illegally decimate the federal government through his Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE). Trump went on to bemoan "the Radical Left Lunatics" for "trying to illegally and collusively boycott Tesla, one of the World’s great automakers, and Elon’s 'baby, in order to attack and do harm to Elon, and everything he stands for." Trump, pledging to purchase a Tesla, spent a large part of Tuesday afternoon cutting a commercial for Musk's car company.
It's important to note briefly that it is not a crime to refuse to buy a Tesla, throw the bird at people who drive Teslas, make fun of Tesla drivers online, or hurriedly sell off your Tesla at half its previous market value after being called a "Nazi" in a parking lot. Musk's crashing brand reputation is just the free market in action, something Republicans used to claim they supported. But what's striking about Trump's post is not his baseless threats, which constitute much of his communication on any given day, it's his tone. The president talks about Musk not like a valued colleague or even a friend. No, Trump's plea resembels that of a lovesick woman angrily defending her worthless boyfriend to skeptical friends.
Trump and Musk are consenting adults, of course, but unfortunately, their team-up is ruining lives and threatens to destroy the American economy, so they've made their relationship the public's business. For months now, it's been baffling how Trump, whose narcissism is boundless, has allowed himself to become a supplicant to Musk, instead of getting annoyed and competitive with the billionaire meglomaniac. Looking over Musk's romantic history, however, offers a strong clue. Musk lacks charisma as a public speaker, but his long line of failed and frankly strange relationships with women — which have produced an estimated 14 children — suggests the tech executive is well-versed in the art of interpersonal manipulation. Musk got a lot of practice on the women in his life, and now appears to be using similar strategies on Trump.
Want more Amanda Marcotte on politics? Subscribe to her newsletter Standing Room Only.
In 2010, Musk's ex-wife Justine Wilson, published a chilling account of their marriage in Marie Claire. She describes initially rejecting him for a date in college, but he followed her to the student center and insisted. "He's not a man who takes no for an answer, she wrote. He won her over, she wrote, with over-the-top financial generosity, including handing her a credit card while out shopping and telling her to buy whatever she wanted.
Musk lacks charisma as a public speaker, but his long line of failed and frankly strange relationships with women — which have produced an estimated 14 children — suggests the tech executive is well-versed in the art of interpersonal manipulation.
Entertainment journalist Kat Tenbarge told podcast host Matt Bernstein that this form of "love-bombing" is what many of Musk's former partners describe experiencing. "At the beginning of the relationship, he is really doting. Presents himself as like, 'I'm going to save you.'" On Bluesky, she added that Musk has "a well-established pattern of pursuing younger women" only "to humiliate them later." For instance, he famously had a years-long relationship with the musician Grimes, having 3 children with her — while having children with other women, seemingly behind her back. At one point, his biographer recalls, Musk showed up at a studio while she was recording with a gun and demanded to be included. He dated actress Amber Heard, giving her Teslas as gifts, but she later worried they were bugged, because she said he was "controlling." After their break-up, he appeared to taunt her by posting a private photo online.
Wilson recalled feeling like she and Musk were "soul mates" and he was her own "Alexander the Great" in the lead-up to their wedding. Dancing at their wedding reception, however, she claims he told her, "I am the alpha in this relationship." From there on out, she describes a controlling dynamic, where he would even say to her often that if she were his employee, "I would fire you." When she stood up to him, she said, he divorced her.
While it's not romantic, Musk appears to be engaging the same dynamic with Trump. He lavished Trump with cash, spending at least a quarter-billion on the campaign, and he's now reportedly promising to pour another $100 million into Trump's political outfit. He's using the "won't take no for an answer" technique of never leaving Trump's side, even moving into Mar-a-Lago so that he could keep a close eye on his new "buddy." The love-bombing is over-the-top and incredibly public. Musk jumping around like an excited child at a campaign rally in October was embarrassing to most people, bur for an egotist like Trump, it probably felt like the praise he craves. Musk gushes about Trump shamelessly, telling Fox News, "I love the president" and even tweeting, "I love @realDonaldTrump as much as a straight man can love another man."
Musk also uses a common technique that manipulative men use against their partners: the old "it's just you and me against the world, babe" narrative to convince their target to ignore people's concerns about their relationship.
The cringeworthiness of all this love-bombing is part of the strategy. Musk has practiced for years on various women, honing the skill of making them feel like he loves them so much he doesn't care if it's embarrassing. Someone like Trump, whose narcissism feeds on a belief that people are bowing for him, is probably a far easier mark than most of the women who fell for Musk's phony groveling.
To be excruciatingly clear, Trump is not a victim. No one is easier to con than a con artist, precisely because they are so susceptible to flattery. A lot of good women fall for this nonsense because they're socialized with romantic tales of being "rescued" by the handsome "prince," and learn the hard way that's just a fairy tale. Trump, on the other hand, made himself vulnerable to this manipulation by being a childish narcissist who will give the world to anyone who fawns over him.
No, the victim isn't Trump, but the entire nation. Republicans and Trump's base voters are increasingly expressing anxiety over the way DOGE's rampage through the federal bureaucracy is harming not just the hated "liberals," but his own voters. In the past, Trump likely would have been concerned with keeping those people on board, but right now, he seems too enthralled with Musk to defy his beloved's wishes.
Even Trump cheerleader Steve Bannon is lashing out about all this, calling Musk "truly evil" and warning on his podcast that Musk is a threat to the larger MAGA movement. Bannon has a healthy ego himself, but he's not wrong that it's really stupid politics for Trump to saddle up with Musk, who is now going after Social Security and Medicare. Trump, addled as he is, still understands that it's unwise to alienate his largely elderly base by attacking two popular programs they depend on. But he shows no sign of actually getting in Musk's way. Instead, he reportedly told Bannon to lay off Musk, and is trying to get Bannon to go to dinner and make peace with the billionaire. As long as Musk continues to love-bomb Trump, we can expect that Trump will defend his self-declared "first buddy," no matter what other allies he alienates in the process.
Read more
about Trump's rocky relationship with Musk
Shares